Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
