the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
