So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
