literally had 100 drinks last night.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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