You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
