oh god the rape fog is back!
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
