I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Randomize
