Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize