More tranny stories later!
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
