4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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