White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
tell me about the fingering
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
