I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
you would pick up someone in the library
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
