Your tits are I can't wait for
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
