glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
