test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
