So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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