You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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