I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
