Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
