handjob tips. give me some.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
