do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize