i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
