Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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