We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
