Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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