We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
