That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
