I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
