we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I haven't been this sober since birth.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize