why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
her vagine was all disorganized.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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