So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
