We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize