Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
