she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
