He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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