I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize