i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
