how hairy? two words: wookie tits
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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