Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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