That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
