Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
