what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
organizing the empties. That sober.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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