Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
