yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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