So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
