if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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