i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
