I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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