A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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