Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
why didn't you poke me back
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
