You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
